A couple of weeks ago, I collaborated with the photographer, Luxlens from Model Mayhem and I have to admit although this is one of my first photoshoots, this one will stand the test of time.
I never thought in a million years that I would do a sexy shoot like this before when I was 240 pounds. I wasn’t comfortable with my body and I hated looking at myself in the mirror. It was painful to see my appearance drastically change from curvy to overweight. I lost control of my eating habits and I considered walking as my only way to exercise. At one point, I almost became diabetic and my health was deteriorating.
Losing weight can shift your perspective on how you feel about yourself. Its important that you see weight-loss as a motive for yourself and not for others who may influence you. I lost weight after leaving a toxic relationship. I didn’t intentionally mean to do it at first, but I wanted to break the bad habits and change my life for me. I did not enjoy the first half of my 20’s because I was too ashamed of my body and I didn’t understand my worth. I saw myself as a Monster and didn’t think anyone would find me attractive or interesting enough. Being overweight did not fulfill my happiness.
My main focus in life is to take care of my mental and physical health now. They go hand in hand because we all experience the challenges of body image and comparing our physical appearances to others. We are human. It happens to everyone.
Not every person has to be a size 0 or a size 14 for that matter. I am still not completely satisfied with my appearance, but I have come a long way. I lost 100lbs and I see that your life can completely change in a year with discipline and realistic goals.
I am learning to love my life again. I deserve it.
Now that I lost the weight, I am taking a chance with modeling. Regardless of what happens with the career in my future, I am keeping myself motivated and inspired to do more with my life.
Credit: Photographer, Luxlens. Model Mayhem # 4040556